Getting Divorced? Here Are 7 Important Tips for Mothers
As a mother of children going through a divorce, it can be a stressful experience to recognize that your life is going through a significant change. Although divorce is never easy for anyone, becoming a single mother through divorce can be extremely difficult, so it can help to begin the process of preparing yourself for your new role. Below are some tips to keep in mind when going through the process of divorce with a family. Remember that becoming a single mother is one of the hardest things you may have to go through in your life, but it will only make you a better and stronger person as time goes on.
Focus on the Present
In the midst of a divorce, it is easy to start thinking about the past or about the future. However, doing so will only lead to dwelling on raw or difficult emotions, or overanalyzing things that may never come to pass. Instead, when you are still in the process of divorcing or have recently finalized your divorce, you can help keep yourself grounded by focusing on the present and on the things you can control.
Becoming a single mother through divorce is a new situation to find yourself in. You can begin to adapt to your new role by searching for resources to help educate yourself about how to best be a single mother. There are plenty of free online courses, resources, and checklists for you to take advantage of. In addition, there are also lots of local, state, and federal government programs out there for single parents that you may be eligible for.
Secure Your Financial Situation
Although it can be tempting to want to buy your children toys or trips or experiences during this difficult time, it is important to stop worrying about what luxuries you can’t afford to buy your children. Instead, work on securing your finances while you focus on spending time with your children, which is more likely to create memories or feelings they will remember for years to come.
Remember to Stay Positive
Becoming a single parent can create a crushing amount of anxiety and worry. Sometimes, defeating feelings of self-doubt is as simple as keeping a positive attitude. This can be accomplished by remembering the simple moments you get to enjoy with your children and emotionally or mentally rewarding yourself for each good day you have by yourself or with your children.
Work on an Amicable Relationship with Your Ex
One of the worst things you can do for your children’s emotional or mental well-being is to have a poor relationship with their father. No matter how contentious your relationship is with your children’s father, you should avoid displaying conflict in front of your children. Even when in your own home, you should not disparage your ex to your children. Instead, put your best effort forward to try to build an amicable, productive co-parenting relationship with you and your ex. That way, your children never feel the temptation to compete for your and your ex’s affection. However, always be ready to stand up for yourself and your children if your ex proves to be difficult or a narcissist.
Rely on the Resources Available to You
Even as a single mother, you don’t have to parent on your own. There are plenty of government and community resources to help you through this transition. In particular, look to connect with a local community group of single moms, which can not only provide you with helpful skills but also provide emotional and mental support.
Finally, remember to prioritize the time you get to spend with your children in the here and now. Children grow up so quickly, so you don’t want to miss important events worrying about the past or things you cannot control in the future.
Contact a Cherry Hill Family Law Attorney for a Consultation About Divorce in New Jersey Today
If you are thinking about filing for divorce, or if you have already started the divorce process and are dealing with another matter such as child custody, child support, or division of assets, you need to speak with a qualified attorney. Family law lawyer, Lois Garber Schwartz, Esq. represents clients throughout the state, including Mt. Laurel, Haddonfield, Moorestown, and Cherry Hill. She understands how challenging this time can be for you, which is why she will fight hard to protect your interests, and the interests of your loved ones, throughout the legal process. Call her at (856) 482-8799 or fill out our confidential contact form to schedule a consultation. She has an office conveniently located at 1040 Kings Hwy. N., Suite 202, Cherry Hill, NJ 08034.
The articles on this blog are for informative purposes only and are no substitute for legal advice or an attorney-client relationship. If you are seeking legal advice, please contact our law firm directly.